Eddie Montgomery Made Me Cry

The voice on the other end of the phone was thick. It was a mixture of a long afternoon of imbibing low rent liquor, watching the future melt into a promise of violence and upholding values few people ever truly inhabit, but mindlessly invoke to justify macho knee-jerk posturing and, well, the comradeship of the road. Behind the voice, the screen was a parade of talking heads tracking and trafficking the action, the fall-out and the impact of the US military strike against the Taliban, who'd blown-up America's blind faith in our safety being a God-given right. And the call to which the larger-than-life hillbilly singer was grappling was pretty standard issue in the world of the neo-famous. There was a request -- from the Associated Press' broadcast division for country music's names and faces to react and respond to our nation's actions. Eddie Montgomery, half of Montgomery Gentry -- the Lexington, Kentucky-based twosome that upended Brooks & Dunn's longest-winning streak in the history of the Country Music Association's annual Awards when they dark horsed their way into the 2000 Duo of the Year crown, was a logical voice to enlist. The last of the full-grown men in country music, he and his partner Troy Gentry sang about tattoos and scars, lost afternoons and shattered hearts, antique values and veterans who've grown battered by their forgotten role in the world. So one would think a jingoistic request to rah-rah the fighting men would be just the sort of siren song a good ole boy would live for. Bring it on, he'd beller from his bar-stool, let's whip the troops into a frenzy, create a nationalistic battle cry and show those freedom-hating so-and-sos the glory of God and ole glory. But Eddie Montgomery's having none of it at this moment. "What's the doctor saying?" he asks, voice thicker with worry than Beam-infused braggadocio. "When will you know something?" I, too, am on a barstool. Though my drink is water -- my doctor suggesting staying away from the hard stuff as the stitches inside me grapht a new seam to hold me together -- and my request is standard operating procedure as a publicist and apologist for some of the people whose music will no doubt become the soundtrack for the impending engagement. Indeed, Lee Ann Womack's "I Hope You Dance" has been embraced as a song of healing and hope, a remembrance of what this way of life we fought for is made of -- and Brooks & Dunn's "Only In America," sung by vocal flamethrower Ronnie Dunn and written by Louisiana dervish Kix Brooks about the perils and promise of the American Dream, has turned into a self-esteem-steeped call to pride for country music fans that has more verve, more twist, more adrenaline-steeping pump than any latter-day USA-All-The-Way anthem out there. No, not for us the maudlin or the mawkish. We are the proud, the brave, the free. We want to be empowered and emboldened. We want to fly high and show the enemy who's the boss. But right now, my throat is tight. My client isn't so sure about jumping on the phone to tout his point-of-view. What he -- in all his imposing 6' 5" blackclad glory -- wants to know is what the doctor has to say. And as a tear rolls down my cheek, I have to confess that I don't know, won't know 'til midweek because of the legal holiday and the time it takes cells to germinate and generate in a petri dish in a sterile environment somewhere. Even worse, I have to confess that I'm afraid. Afraid of what I don't know -- since I am smart enough to know that whatever is is already. And there is no magic door or wand that can pass over me, taking it all back -- spinning the room, spinning the ugly reality through some fairy dust centrifugal forcefield through a time/space/gravity vortex and into the never was. No, I am afraid. And just as I can hear the Beam and Coors Lite in the client's lazy vowels, he can hear the tentative response, the not sure how much to tell, the not aware of what the most in-control person he knows is giving away in the pauses. "You know, baby doll, it's gonna be fine," he says with a split rail tone that is as solid as the 220 acres of hay he's just baled back home. "You're one of God's angels, and he's not ready to take you from us just yet." "Okay…" comes through the tightness and tentativeness, trying to sound appreciative, trying to ratify the faith that's being served. "No, no," he says. He feels the lack of faith, the tripping over one's confidence. "I mean it, you're one of God's angels here on earth. There ain't nothing wrong with you…just a little scare. There's too much for you to do, to give for this to be anything bad. I promise you: it's gonna be alright." Bad things don't happen to people like me. It's the lie we serve ourselves to fuse the teflon with the kryptonite, just as we don't look down or close our eyes when we must get through. We're pillars more than people, propping up, taking care of others. You need faith? I'll give you mine, You need vision? Look through my eyes. You need passion? I burn so other's can feel the fire and blaze in a way that draws moths to their flame. It is my gift. I am a woman who'd write"midwifing people's dreams" on the Occupation portion of applications. Though the straight world much prefers "Media Relations and Artist Development," as dubious and obscure an explanation as the aforementioned phrase. Having built a life knowing how to deal with anything -- malicious ex-husbands, tawdry inferences, partycentric lifestyles, life-shattering illnesses and a general lack of respect -- and corner with the fastest and bestest, there's a confidence that meets each morning. Bring it on. I am ready. I will make it happen, make it shine, make it sing. I believe in the power of music to imbue life with deeper meaning, to create context for my own unruly emotions, to inspire us all to be more, to reach higher, to believe in what can be rather than whatever mundane "is" may be this moment. Transformation and wings, joy and ache and surviving the devastation. The sketched lines of what we've been and what we wish to be… it's all there, if we'll just allow it to lift us up. Except right now. My resolve falters. I feel a fear that I can't walk through, can't talk through, can't quantify into something more manageable. There was a lump, missed because of thirty pounds of mental bondage and ice cream. Found in my yearly exam. Mammogrammed and ultra-sounded and appearing to be routinely out-of-order…. until the follow-up surgeon bypassed the needle core sample and went straight to the surgical biopsy. Not only straight to it, but straight to it less than 40 hours later. Suddenly the girl who handles everything wasn't so handled or heeled. Having picked up my "films" for the surgical consultation, the resolve had started oozing away -- and knowing a 6 a. m. check-in for a 7:30 cutting was imminent, I tried everything at my disposal. "As if" was enlisted and engaged. A black tie Hall of Fame induction dinner -- wearing floorlength black lace Chanel flapperish body-skimming lusciousness and punk funk hair in a confection of fashion and youthfusion -- where many's moment of glory was marred by timing seemed the perfect denial. Look as beautiful as one can, make the small talk about the big issues, sweep the room and ratify each other's glorious spot in the orbit of the right-now-country-kingdom, while being dwarfed by the accomplishments of the Delmore Brothers, Sam Phillips, Bill Anderson, Waylon Jennings, the Everlys, Don Gibson and the Louvins (among others) -- names that the young'uns and many of the midlevels couldn't explain with a sixshooter to the temple. Pretend it's just another glory night. Smile the smile. Push the food around the plate. Nod with recognition. Smile the smile. Sweep the doubts away. Bask in the plushness of Raul Malo's velour and cohiba voice as he works through a sampling of the inductees best known work. Find an escape. Perhaps have a meaningful exchange amongst the rubble of cocktail talk -- and keep smiling the smile. Smile that smile through the tears as the make-up comes off, the hair comes down and the fear wells back up. Breast cancer is more than pink ribbons and races for the cure. It is 192,000 new invasive cases this year. It is ads that are even found in Gentleman's Quarterly, invoking the real truth of the second most common form of cancer found in women in this country: daughters, sisters, mothers, friends, wives, grandmothers, fighters, survivors victors. But, me? It is a sqeaky voice that asks that question. One that knows the truth is larger than any spin that can be created, any reality that could be shaded. And the fear isn't the fear of failing the client, the song or the dream…. it is the bigger fear: leaving before whatever I've been sent here to do is done. It's not so much mortality -- though come on, who wants to be sick? Let alone sick in a way that could be fatal? -- than it is knowing how much time has been squandered, how little has been accomplished. We are put here to touch people's lives, to inspire, to comfort, to find our way and show others their's. What if I don't? As someone who works incessantly, who fights for the dreams of others, is it vanity or a personal quest? I'd like to think it's the former. And as Buddy and Julie Miller, paint-peeling ache intertwined with broken winged whisper, intertwine on "How She Cries" from their self-titled Hightone release, I ponder the point of it all. I am a true believer. I have to believe in whatever this is. But through the tears and the shaking and the pain and bandages of where they "got it," I'm not strong enough to get there on my own. In these lost hours, in a small apartment over an Italian restaurant on South County Road, I think about an overgrown cowboy and his simple assurance, about a hillbilly guitar slinger who talked me to sleep, about a good friend who shared a glass of cote du Rhone, an old beau who flew down to help pack an apartment so I could embark on what should be the next chapter, a babe-ular girl singer who sent flowers and prayers, a couple long distance calls from back home just to see how the baby rock critic was holding and e-mail to the doctor from a woman no less than TIME proclaimed, "sings the truth and serves it up raw." They say that you don't always get what you want, but sometimes you just might get what you need. As morning streaks across the Atlantic, with the tentative reach and brush of gray with perhaps a hint of warmth shot through, I believe that to be true. We may not always understand the difference between want and need -- just as fear and doubt sometimes blur into each other as a muddy confusion. But in this desolate moment, I see the difference: friends who reach out when you're too paralyzed to let them know you're in bigger need than you ever thought possible. The trouble with fear: you're afraid to voice it. If you tell, it will be become reality. So you suffer in silence. Or let a very few people know. And it grows inside you like a man-eating plant. In the immortal words of Emory Gordy, Junior: "Let your friends do the worrying. You should laugh and enjoy the drugs." It's not really that easy. Just like trusting that your friends can be what you need when it's all vastness and darkness and doubt. The irony, of course, is that they will be far more then you could ever need -- if you'll just let them. Tom Petty knew the waiting was the hardest part. What he missed were the everyday angels that carried you when you couldn't carry yourself. Maybe the answers aren't what you want, but what you learn is a gift that just may sustain no matter what. In a bleak whirl of doubt and heavy sighs, I'll take it.
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exhaling in the pummeling rain on a1a

spent the tail end of yesterday afternoon playing chicken staring down a phone message from my doctor's office WHY would they be calling on monday when they told me there would be no information until wednesday unless the news was so ragingly, painfully bad that there was no point finishing germination? having finally gotten some sleep all day yesterday i was groggy from something other than the pain medication and i found the fear running through my veins again like a train through the mountains rolling with the momentum of a downhill run, rolling with the power of uphill locomotion my heart racing like a rabbit on the discovery channel, about to be dinner for some fanged beast of prey and knowing the observers weren't going to intercede so i went to the grocery store and there in the publix, between the mojo criollo + the fresh fruit, the crunchy peanut butter and the spanish saffron looking way into the "i don't have a problem" DTs it occurred to me (eek): not calling doesn't outrun the outcome bad news is still bad stuff, even if you refuse to let them tell you pick up the phone, stupid, and dial and so i did... there along the ocean highway with the rain coming down sideways, the malibu flashing and crawling my heart pounding harder than tommy lee in motley crue's most rocking days terrified and driving and holding for dr cooper's nurse the poor nurse forced to tell me to get on a plane because, you know, i must be amputated from the waist up "you're cancer free..." WHAT? "your tests are back... cancer and pre-cancer free" I AM? "yes, you have a pappiloma...and dr cooper can explain that when you come in for your follow-up visit." But...I'm...okay? "perfect." and that's when the crying started. sobbing. bawling. then crying all by itself. in classic holly fashion, though, i also threw up... too much adrenalin with nowhere to go so it created its own exit path and then i cried some more relief. joy. surprise. it was all there. everything i was sure i wouldn't be feeling at the end of the phone call terrified that if i told myself it was nothing, fate would not be amused that i wasn't taking this situation seriously and ZOT the hell out of me terrified enough that i wouldnt consider the possibities for fear of making it real fate being cranky with my lack of faith and ZOTTING the hell out of me so somewhere in a reality akin to a green grape suspended in red jello where denial didn't exactly run rampant, nor fatality frolic like a colt in pastures of green i tried to be stoic, gargle with terror and act as if i don't know how i did really i do know that the people i told made me feel better and everyone who responded to the e-mail were angels with wings on their fingers thank you in ways you can't imagine, for things you wouldn't consider fear of being erased is as bad as the fear of pain i'd like to believe that a bad thing wouldn't make people sidestep me the way we sometimes do street people when we know we can't change their fate people are our greatest strength for just when i was sure i wasn't going to make it to wednesday came this outpouring of strength and hope and love it hopefully wasn't too taxing for you but a huge deal for me and i thank you for it know how powerful little things can be give them whenever you can because my doctor was aggressive about something that was potentially life-threatening -- the very same course of action andre agassi's 30 year old sister took + ended up being positive, but now back in step and shape with a perfect recovery rolling out before her) and know somewhere amongst the packing boxes, i am laughing a laugh of the freaked and now settling that awkward sound that means i have seen experienced something bad but it looks like all is okay because that's where i am this morning painfully grateful both for the results and you and eddie montgomery who let me know to let people reach back a-men and then some it ain't an aerosmith review, but to me -- i PROMISE -- it's every bit as exhilerating! ps: the doctor's office had told me it was tuesday or wednesday because if the results had been dodgy, they'd have wanted to run them twice and because my doctor's speaking at a medical conference and wouldn't have been able to make the double-checked call until then and wisely, he didn't think it was something he should palm off on an assistant talk about sigh and the some -- -- Holly Gleason
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driving + crying… two lanes running through my heart 9/11

hard to believe i'd ever not just jump on a plane and maybe out of respect for those who NEED to get places quickly i opted to drive up to cleveland for a couple items of business this weekend 8, almost nine hours in a car...and yet in light of what's befallen our country, it was the best thing i could have ever done we live these go-go fast paced lives, racing and jumping and twisting to fit it all in, hit the mark, make our number and the pressure builds and the pressure drains us of the basics like how beautiful our country truly is rolling out of nashville on the three lanes of I-65 north it was green and rolling, as the nation fell beneath my tires relinquishing the ground that is all of our's to cherish, to savor, to embrace the hills were reaching up toward the horizon, but they were also beckoning me to come forward and really consider this land… kentucky was those stone faces, blown apart to make way for concrete ribbons all the jagged edges, the piles of slate extending different lengths like shelving built to last forever, holding the tales of all who'd ever traveled through there and the lushness of it all the pine needles scraping out against the blue the thick, forest and emerald green of oaks and maples and every other tree rich with sap, bobbling on the breeze, tranquil, yet strong at rest because it's the posture that best suits sun dappled fridays those trees lining the hillside, rising and falling with the topography but always reaching to the heavens with a faith that defies gravity even as there is nothing more firmly rooted in the rich kentucky soil and there was louisville in all its preserved glory exactly as it was, even as it grows more modern every day reminding me that the past is the key to the future and forgetting what we were and are negates the fertile lives we've led that brought us here... for the birthright and the experience accrued is a gift kentucky, with it's white fences and its horsey allusions (even their highway signs) offered that sense of the land as emerging power... as the ground moving and swelling... as something that is a force of its own ohio offered its fecundity as a broad gift once cincinnati with its skyline and its stadium and its merging lanes fell away and the two lane each way (no superhighway for my home state) pulled away from the bottom bookend of the buckeye state, ohio's vast expanses spread themselves endlessly before like the sun dying -- spilling melted crimson lipstick beyond the eye's view -- on the ocean in key west... behind barbed wire or split rail fences, the fields are ready for the harvest the corn probably taller than i am... brown with its tassles swinging in the wind green fields with yellow flowers on the tips, some crop i probably should know hayfields half-mowed, with the big rolls of winter-food for livestock left in the midst of the newly shorn green fields where they promise both a future filled with more waving grasses to be brought in and the knowledge that winter will not starve the cattle or the sheep or the horses or whatever else they'll feed it to there were the paint peeling barns in reds and whites with tar black roofs the aging witnessing the time already committed to a way of life that keeps our country strong -- and reminds us, too, that farm aid's message (keep family farmers on the farm) is as much about protecting a way of life that was the backbone of this country you could see flags on the mailboxes, where the access roads abutted 71 and those mailboxes all sported those tiny flags in tangible demonstration of their commitment to the greater way of life... and the houses and the fields and the equipment and the crops are all part of this amazing multi-layered truth that is this country... that is the unseen things that are the fiber of our being sure, the roads were scarred and patched. the ride was bumpy and hot and i think i got sunburned on my face while driving but it was also breath-taking, to come over a hill and see an amazing valley to look down from a bridge and see the water flowing forward, not concerned about who did it or what does it mean just moving forward in tranquility, the power coiled in the current + the faith lodged in something higher yet more basic i drove because i was afraid to fly i arrived a rich woman, reacquainted with the majesty that is this land to see trees creating a canopy for travel to watch tobacco leaves bend and wave and sigh to know that there is richness in the soil that will feed us forever if cared for what more could be want from our nation? it is a gorgeous, beautiful, inspiring place in its raw forms it is worth seeing to remember where it all starts from if you're feeling weak or small or scared or impotent get in your car get out of town drive 'til you come to a much less cultivated or urban place and just feast on what you see... it will take you to a place where you heart soars, your eyes tear and your soul is fed in ways that it desparately needs right now i promise because i could feel much of my terror and sadness falling away... a tranquility and a joy replacing it just when i needed it most and was sure it was to temporal to even try to chase sure i wept a few tears, but they were tears of recognition with jimmy webb's "wish you were here" and "just like always" playing as the miles fell away with the sun-dappled afternoon and those tears set me free for whatever it's worth it's not giving blood, but if what you can do is remind yourself how vast and beautiful it is what better gift for yourself and your fellow travellers? indeed and may st christopher go with you! xoxox holly g cleveland, ohio by way of nashville, tennessee 18 sept 2001
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